Tuesday, February 22, 2011

On people being weird.

So I was exposed to three different, totally bizarre things today that I want to share with all of you.

1. Sand-pouring ceremonies. Have you seen this shit? I mean, no offense to you if you're totally into this, but I didn't plan to come away from my wedding with a craft-fair piece of clutter.

Apparently, people actually do this.
We had one of those candle-lighting things at our wedding, which was pretty tacky to me, but we had someone important to us get us a candle for it, and it gave us a chance to have Andy's sister sing a really pretty song while we stood around and people stared at us. I guess the sand-pouring thing is only a little bit crazier than the candle thing, at least symbolically, except that I don't really get what the layers of sand are supposed to represent. At least with the candle thing, there's only one flame that represents the two people.

In a somewhat related bit of crazy, I found out my work-friend's friend almost included a broom-jumping ceremony in their pagan wedding thing which also involved sand-pouring. I seriously think that two white folks performing a slave ritual in honor of some goddesses or something would be pretty offensive. But then, I'm kind of an asshole, so whatever.

2. My friend sent me a link to a knitting pattern for a shawl for a chicken. I'm not kidding. The website on which she found it also features updates on what's happening in the lives of the author's Sims characters. With screenshots. It was riveting. I couldn't stop reading about which Sim refused to take out the trash and which one peed herself because she was having too much fun painting. It is 2011. I can't believe the Sims are still a thing.

3. I got a book out of the library on spinning. I know how to park-and-draft, which is basically where everyone starts with a drop spindle, but I need to know more about, like, what to do when my spindle's getting full and how to ply the singles and stuff. (Does any of this make sense to any of you?) Well, the book I got turned out to be part of an awesome series on self-sufficiency. I think the publishers are trying to help people get ready to live in a post-apocalyptic world. Other titles in the series include: Keeping Chickens; Cheesemaking; Beekeeping; and Preserving. I seriously found myself thinking, "I live in the suburbs so I don't have to do any of that." I know there's a big push for local, sustainable agriculture, but I have no desire to start a farm. I like sleeping too much for that shit.

However, I do think that my fiber skills would be quite helpful in a post-apocalyptic society. I'd trade my yarn and hand-knitted goods for some of your chicken eggs, or whatever. I get it.

1. What do you think of sand-pouring ceremonies? Am I just being an asshole, or are they tacky? 2. Do you still play the Sims? Do you blog about it? 3. What skills do you have that would translate well to a post-apocalyptic world? (Answer one, or all three, or whatever! There are no rules in the Land of Awkward!)


  1. I used to do sand pouring when i was a little girl, like for arts and crafts fun. I didn't know that it was still around, let alone that there were "ceremonies". It sounds tacky, and I would probably try and avoid something like this at all costs?

    A shawl for a chicken?!

  2. I immediately thought of craft fairs when I heard about this, and I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thinks it's tacky. And yes, it was a tiny little shawl, with a picture of it wrapped around a fuzzy yellow chick. I have no information on whether or not the chick kept it on.