Wednesday, September 7, 2011

How to be a domestic goddess

1. Leave work 17 minutes late, to make up for arriving at work 17 minutes late.
2. Stop at weird small-town grocery store on the way home. Go to the complete wrong side of the store on a hunt for milk. Who the hell keeps milk way over there? Realize as you wander through the meat department that you have absolutely no idea how much meat is supposed to cost, as Andy is in charge of all meat-buying decisions in our home. Find the milk. Balk at paying $1/gallon more than you would have if you planned an actual grocery shopping trip.
3. Get home. Preheat oven. Peel several quarts of peaches. Do cobbler-type stuff to them. While they're heating, make bread-type portion of cobbler. Split bubbly, delicious peaches into several pans, as these cobblers will be shared.
4. While cobblers bake, halve and pit a few quarts of plums. Clean out weird lidded container that will have to do for storage. Dump plums into container, top with a gallon (!) of brandy. Shake carefully, as lid hasn't given any indication that it's watertight. Put on bar in basement. Cross one more item off mental list of Christmas-type things.
5. Start cleaning kitchen. Take cobblers out of oven. Keep cleaning kitchen.
6. Take one cobbler to neighbors. Wrap one cobbler with tin foil to take to coworker whose daughter outfitted our nursery. Put lid on final cobbler to take to housewarming party tonight.

I'm on Step 3. So far, I've done really well with leaving work late and taking forever to find the milk in a weird grocery store. So, you know, we'll see how much of a domestic goddess I am when it's 8 pm and I'm supposed to be walking into the party with a perfect cobbler.


  1. I can do the get to work 17 minutes late part and the gallon of brandy.

  2. I definitely felt like I needed to explain myself when I put the empty bottle of the cheapest brandy we could find in the recycling bin. "Dear Trash Guy, it's for a Christmas project. Really."