Tuesday, May 17, 2011

On luck

Okay, so I had a cheerful little post planned for today. The main factor in this is as follows:

First, on Monday I got an email from Megan at NotMartha, telling me I had won her giveaway of The Wilder Life. No way! I have been using the internet for a long time now and have entered approximately one fuckton of giveaways and this was the first time I have been selected to win anything. Not to mention, the book looks totally awesome and I own copies of the whole Little House series but one (I got it at a yard sale, and one of them is missing and I always forget which when I see other copies for sale cheap).

Then yesterday the book arrived (what? Less than a week later? No way!) with a sweet little note for the marketing manager who worked on it (who, somehow between yesterday and today my brain transformed into the editor) with an invitation to let her know what I think, with her email address and stuff. Cool. (This was cooler when I thought the editor was writing to me, but still. Cool.)

This morning I checked my email before work, and I won Knitty's ridiculously awesome fiber-for-spinning giveaway. I am such a novice at handspinning that I probably can't even appreciate how awesome this is. I will be consulting with my friend's mom who spins and seeing what she can teach me about how to deal with this. I was one of 391 people who tried to win that shit, and I won it within a week of winning something from the internet for the first time in my life. Crazy. The fiber itself is worth almost $100. I can't believe it.

Then Andy was all, "Hey, want to go out to get sushi tonight instead of Friday?" and I was extra-psyched because I didn't have to think about making dinner and I could just get a fucking crawdad bowl (SO GOOD) and some hamachi maki instead! THIS IS WHAT CHARLIE SHEEN THAT FUCKING ASSHOLE MUST HAVE MEANT ABOUT WINNING AT EVERYTHING OR WHATEVER.

So I came home, super cheerful despite my job running a secret study on the long-term effects of severe boredom, and played some awesome raucous indoor fetch with my fetch-challenged dogs. In a move I would really like to be able to blame on the dogs, I somehow managed to hit a framed piece of art with one of those rag dogbone things, knocking said art off the wall, whereupon it bounced off the coffee table and broke apart. It's a cheap reproduction of Starry Night that my parents inexplicably bought Andy for Christmas a year after we started dating, but it worked fine on the wall there and didn't deserve to die. Cool.

Then I went pee and as I was peeing (bathroom talk two days in a row! You guys are the lucky ones, I guess!) I realized my gum was an almost-flavorless nub of hard shit that was starting to hurt my jaw, so as I was zipping up I spit the gum out, aiming for the toilet. I missed. I spit gum onto my bathroom floor, like a heathen or some shit. Sighing dramatically (so the dogs would know I was no longer the happy-go-lucky spirit I had been four minutes before, when I had arrived home), I bent over to pick it up (before flushing, so I didn't get a facefull of pee-mist) and dunked the end of my favorite, it-was-a-present-from-Andy, wear-only-rarely-so-as-not-to-diminish-its-specialness scarf into the fucking pee water. I stood up, gasping, and realized I had just dripped the pee water from the scarf onto my cashmere sweater.

So I hand-washed the sweater and the scarf in the bathtub and while I was doing that, Andy texted me that no, we were going to do the sushi thing on Friday after all because the friend couldn't switch. So I am home, wearing a tanktop in my fucking cold house, hand-washing pee water out of two of my favorite items of clothing, and realize this means I should have stopped for dinner ingredients after all. It is cold and raining and I am not leaving the house again, so it looks like we are having canned soup and fish sticks for dinner. Almost as good as spicy crawdads with rice and fresh sushi, right?

This post has no real conclusion. I'm just hoping the universe is done trying to even shit out and will let me watch Bones in peace for a little while. Christ.

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