It's all in my head.

Andy and I went out for dinner at California Rollin', which is one of those weird sushi places that have waitresses who wear shirts that say things like "I LIKE IT RAW" and equally awful crap, plus their sushi is "creative." I prefer traditional sushi - like, the kind without barbecue sauce, pesto, or cream cheese - but Andy had a groupon (you know about groupon, right?), so off we went.

We always get the crawdad bowl as an appetizer. I never in a million years would have thought, "Oh, tempura crawdads in a sweet and spicy sauce! Let's get that!" but I tried it when some friends ordered it and now if we don't get it I feel like my night was a waste. Usually, it's 100% awesome. But tonight, some of the crawdads tasted a little... fishy. Like, I know crawdads are technically a seafood-type item, but I've never had one that tasted like it was made from fish.

So I have an overactive imagination, and now I'm pretty sure I have food poisoning. It was 78° when we left the restaurant, but of course I felt hot because I was starting to get ill. I keep burping and tasting sushi, and of course that's bad crawdads and not the 22 ounces of Sapporo I knocked back (shut up, it's a better deal to get the bigger can). Any rumblings are indicative of future puking, and not related to the fact that I had two handfuls of mixed nuts, four plums, and a peach for lunch. 


Have you ever had food poisoning? I don't think I've ever told you all this, but I went home sick from my first day at my current job with food poisoning. At ten a.m. It was awful. I puked in a bathroom that I had to have someone give me directions to, because it was my second time in the building ever. I stopped on my way home to get a pregnancy test, because why the hell was I barfing at ten in the morning, and some ginger ale, and threw up again in the bathroom at the grocery store. It was a really, really gross day. On the upside, as my work best friend pointed out to me, I set the bar really low, so if I made it to lunch on day two, everyone would be impressed!


Ugh. Now all I can think about is how those crawdads tasted a little wrong (Andy confirmed that they were a little weird, but he has a digestive system like a Komodo dragon and never gets sick from eating questionable things). And the last time I had food poisoning. And whether or not my stomach is in fact rumbling. Maybe I should have some ginger ale and lay on the couch and watch some Netflix. We've been working our way slowly through Dirty Jobs, but I don't know if suspecting I'm going to barf and watching Mike Rowe shovel poop is a good idea.


Have you ever had food poisoning? Isn't it the worst? Have you ever mentally talked yourself into being sick?