Hippie weekend and nine-month checkup

We had a pretty awesome weekend. On Friday night, we did nothing. We had an invite to go out to dinner and we turned it down to stay home and hang out quietly. We watched a movie called Extract, which we had never heard of but which stars Jason Bateman and Kristin Wiig and Mila Kunis and Ben Goddamn Affleck. Better than expected.

On Saturday we spent the day in a family friend's log cabin, making pickled beets. No joke. We made a smallish batch earlier in the year (May?) and absolutely flew through them. Turns out people like pickled beets - even Andy, an avowed beet hater. We brought a pint camping and they were gone that same night, and two people asked if we had any more. We've gone through six pints since May, so we decided to make a bigger batch to take us through the winter. We went a little overboard, though: we canned 10 quart jars and 14 pint jars full of chopped beets. (The recipe we used was from the Ball Blue Book, but it was a lot like this one, plus three cups of onions.) They get processed for half an hour so they're silky and spicy and delicious. Try them, even if you think you hate beets. Try them. Don't even halve the recipe if you think you hate them, because you'll find people who will happily snatch up your extra jars.

On Sunday, we spent the day at the Finger Lakes Fiber Arts Festival. It's my third time going but Andy's first, and by the time we left he was slightly less enthusiastic than I was. There is so much to see and touch and to lust after. My goal was to not buy any roving this year, and I'm proud to say I succeeded. I only got one skein of yarn, and I had Andy pick it out! He and I use color in very different ways, so it's neat to have him pick something out and see how it knits up. We got a skein of Bitsy Knits sock yarn in a colorway called Midnight Bells, which is grey and yellow and orange and red. It's destined to become a dress for the baby.

Today we had the baby's nine-month checkup, and she's doing fantastically well. The baby's dad didn't show up, despite being told about the appointment at least ten times. I was a little surprised that he didn't come, since he has been told that involvement in her medical care will be a factor if/when he files for custody. (Her mom was invited too but we didn't expect her to show up, since she still can't hold the baby since she's never proven she's been treated.)

Our girl's hitting just about all of her milestones and the doctors don't have any concerns. She got very, very mad about having to be stripped down to her diaper and even madder about getting a shot. The doctor got to see her have a little hissy fit, and when we asked about that (she throws herself around when she's super mad, which is scary as hell when she's slippery from her bath and doesn't want to be lotioned), the doctor laughed a little and said, "Good luck when she's two."

We switched baby formula

Our doctor suggested we try a new formula for the baby, since she was still spitting up after almost every bottle and because her poop was ... not pleasant. (She got poop in her own armpit on Easter.)

My reactions to the new formula, in order:
1. HOLY GOD IN HEAVEN this shit is expensive. So glad the county pays for it.
2. Oh, hey, it's white instead of tan. Maybe I won't have to spray the living hell out of the neckline of everything the baby's ever worn now, because she eats so enthusiastically she drools out the sides of her mouth.
3. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK HOW DOES IT SMELL EVEN WORSE THAN THE OLD STUFF. (If you haven't smelled baby formula lately, I am very seriously jealous. Shit's nasty.)
4. What? Why the hell is the second ingredient corn syrup solids? How the fuck is that a good thing to be giving to a baby in large quantities? THANKS, AMERICA. (And no, the county doesn't cover the similar-but-not-corn-syrup-laden other kind.)

Also, our county gives us the option of getting the powdered formula or the concentrated kind in cans, which is amazing and if I ever have a child I'm responsible for feeding and breastfeeding isn't an option, I'll sell a kidney before going back to the powder. Anyway, my grocery store only keeps, like, six cans of this new shit in stock, but with WIC you have to use the whole check (which for us is 12 cans) in one go, or you lose the rest of it. So we had to drive around to four different grocery stores to find one that stocked enough of this for us to use a full check. That was a nice way to spend several hours.

However. The baby is spitting up WAY less, almost down to none, and her poop stinks way more but is at least staying where poop is supposed to go. Because this is my blog and I can talk about how the baby's poop smells if I want.

Speaking of which: I am holding her while she is napping, and she just pooped in her sleep. I don't want to wake her up to change her, but it's seriously making my eyes water. My life is not exactly what I envisioned it would be, is what I'm saying here.

Diagnosis confirmed. Again.

Yup.

Since I was working from home anyway, I moved up my WIC appointment (that I was so happy to have been able to push back a month) because the pediatricians want us to try a hypoallergenic formula to see if it helps with the baby's spitting up and apparent reflux. So I got to sit in the WIC office with an itchy, fussy baby for an hour. That was cool.

I called and left a message yesterday for the baby's pediatrician to see what power they have to override the dermatologist. The pediatrician and worker agree that the baby is showing the exact same symptoms, etc., and that the dermatologist was probably wrong.

They called back this afternoon and asked me to bring the baby in to see how things were progressing, and to confirm that I was now showing symptoms. The worker met me there (again, because she is seriously busting her ass on this case - I already called her supervisor to praise her). The doctors saw whatever it was that they needed to in order to confirm it. They also called in their head doctor to consult, and she's putting it in writing that visits must be stopped until further notice. This is both a huge relief and another reason for me to worry, because the grandma is not going to take this well and will likely feel like we're trying to keep the baby from her.

Ugh. I've been going nonstop since the baby woke up (early and fussy), and I have nine million more things to do to disinfect the house again. But I'm beat and I haven't used the treatment cream yet, so vacuuming the couches wouldn't be useful if I was planning to sit on them again tonight, so I made brownies (stress baking for the win!) and am having a Pimm's Cup and am catching up with my Google Reader.

Well, the baby had a visit

with her grandma on Friday.

And Friday night she was really squirmy. Like she was when she was infected. I made Andy come in from another room to confirm it.

Saturday morning we saw telltale spots.

On Sunday we noted that they were worse. And the poor kid was off all weekend - in a cheerful mood then suddenly inconsolable. We tried to tell ourselves maybe she was teething, but the fussiness is the only sign of that, and it matches how she was when she was infected.

Yesterday I took the day off to take her to the doctor. The dermatologist who finally diagnosed her correctly told me he wanted her to be seen by his facility (even though I only trust him there) if she was symptomatic again, so I called them and got the run-around for three hours, and then when I was sort of a pushy bitch (which I HATE doing) they fit us in in the afternoon. With one of the doctors who misdiagnosed her.

Guess what she said.

It's not the skin condition. Even though it looks the same as it did the last three times. Even though Dr. Idiot agreed that it was the skin condition the first time, when it looked just like this. Even though it cleared up immediately after using the prescription all three times (Dr. Idiot: Oh, the cream's a moisturizer. Me, incredulous: I lotion the child twice a day. Dr. Idiot: Oh, okay. [long pause]). When pressed for some sort of diagnosis, she said maybe it's related to the baby's eczema. Which we have almost completely eradicated. And even though it only shows up immediately after a visit. The worker attended the visit with me, and agrees that the doctor is incompetent, but doesn't know what we can do because they are just about the only dermatologists in our county who take Medicaid.

So we didn't get treated, and naturally the baby is miserable. My plan is to wait until Andy and I are showing symptoms and then insist on being seen by the doctor who diagnosed her, or to just say "fuck it" and take the baby to our doctor and pay out of pocket for her. Because this is ridiculous. (I'm really grateful to be able to work from home for a few days while this is getting sorted out, because I'm not infecting the other kids at the baby's daycare on Dr. Idiot's word.)

Oh, and the worker told me that the grandma's planning to file for custody. It's really unlikely that she'll be successful, since the county isn't even trying to place the kid there at all right now, but still. Did we really need another complication here? Christ.

I'm fucking discouraged right now, you guys. I just want to help this baby, who I love like my own, and the goddamn red tape is making that really fucking hard.

P.S. I was going to go through and hyperlink to all the shit about her appointments and misdiagnoses and shit, but I'm fucking tired from trying to work from home while holding an uncomfortable baby who also wanted to help me type. So, you know, check the archives (try the "gross gross gross" tag) and sorry I'm not bothering.

Not baby-related, but very awkward.

Know what's a really uncomfortable three minutes? The three minutes between when you remove all of your clothes, don a paper tablecloth, and sit and wait for your new gynecologist to enter the room. Especially if the exam room doesn't have magazines.

My usual gynecologist's office is closing, so I decided to find a practice closer to my house for my yearly checkup. The place I settled on was highly rated on the internets, and it's literally on my way to work (the old office is 40 minutes away). My new doctor is a very nice Indian man who told me my cervix looked great. I'm considering putting that on my business cards, but I don't really want people asking to see it to confirm it on their own. Andy suggested getting an x-ray of it and using that as the back of the business card, which I think is a really workable idea.

The doctor also told me not to worry about inaccurate results, because he does a pap smear like he really means it. So that's ... reassuring. I guess.

Hey, look! I'm making it awkward!

Three weeks

Today is three weeks we've had the baby. She's still mostly awesome! (The mostly part comes in a four a.m. when she'd rather be held and squirm instead of going back to sleep in her bassinet.)

On Tuesday she had a visit with both of her parents. I totally blanked on the part where I was supposed to send a diaper bag to daycare to have them send on the visit, because I'm still new at this and I'm so tired and all. I called the daycare and had them pack a bottle and some diapers and wipes and a burp rag, which they did. However, I felt like a big dummy and will absolutely have her normal bag packed for her visit with her mom tomorrow.

At the Tuesday visit, the worker told her parents about the baby's doctor's appointments tomorrow and told them they were welcome to attend. They didn't have much notice and the first appointment was at 8:45 in the morning, so I didn't think they'd show, but they both did! They were half an hour late, but they were both there. It was my first meeting with the dad, so I was nervous. He was a nice enough dude, I guess. He spent the entire time we were there talking about himself, which was interesting - he asked me almost nothing about the baby and even tried to talk over the doctor to tell me about his other kids more than once. But he was there and was happy to hold the baby and burp her and stuff, so I guess that's better than nothing.

While we were at the first visit, they ruled out Crazy Genetic Skin Condition and think instead that baby just has a version of Crazy Newborn Baby Rash. They gave us a prescription for some cream to put on it and want to see her again in two weeks to check on it. I did my very best to stand back and let the parents be as involved as they wanted to be. It was just such a new dynamic that I think it was uncomfortable for all of us. The next time I think I'll see them is at court on the 17th.

In the three weeks we've had her, the baby has gained 12 ounces and grown a quarter inch. It's going to be hard to give her up!

She's screaming at me right now for not holding her, so I'm going to go snuggle the heck out of her.